


Ghoul Gossip (They Ship It)

by Half_SubmergedinPurgatory



Series: TG Prompt Collection [21]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Crack, Ghouls love gossip so much, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Prompt Fic, Snake mask is Nishiki for those who haven't read Re
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-07
Updated: 2017-02-07
Packaged: 2018-09-22 17:48:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9618512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Half_SubmergedinPurgatory/pseuds/Half_SubmergedinPurgatory
Summary: PRETTYPISTACHIO:In the Ghoul community word on the street is Kaneki has a "thing" for one Dove (Amon). Kaneki always stops ghouls from killing him cuz Amon Is Off Limits so Rumors spread far and wide mainly a romantic&smutty kind xD But is there truth to it? Can Nishiki question Kaneki? I'll let you decide. Bonus:"Oi, you, Dove, how the hell you'd get in EyePatch's pants?"





	

One thing that no human knew about ghouls, no matter how many studies they did on ghoul behaviour and physiology, was that they loved to gossip. Word on the street could be the difference between a peaceful night ( _as if those ever happened_ ), a scuffle ( _or seven_ ), and a fresh grave. So, whenever something rumour-worthy happened in the ghoul community, you could expect it to catch on fast.  
  
Eyepatch, the scariest mother fucker in the 20th ward, running around and saving a Dove’s ass every other day? That was good gossip material. The greatest gossip material.  
  
Nobody wanted to mess with Eyepatch, after all. If he didn’t come for you himself, everyone knew the Owl would. That, or the Gourmet would try to eat you after the Rabbit siblings had used you as a pincushion.  
  
For awhile, the rumour was interesting enough by itself. Eventually though, people had questions. Why was Eyepatch protecting a Dove?  
  
Did they owe each other some kind of life debt? Eyepatch hadn’t appeared until recently, however.  
  
Had Amon protected one of Eyepatch’s friends? Impossible, he was a Dove and Eyepatch hung out with a pretty powerful crowd.  
  
Amon was a pretty young investigator…  
  
He was known for being handsome…  
  
And extremely stubborn about exterminating ghouls…  
  
Was this…a forbidden romance!?  
  
Ghouls far and wide argued the appeal of this new piece of news. Sure, it would be fun to sleep with a ghoul-hating investigator, a really good “screw you” ( _hehehe_ ), proof of the hypocrisy of humans. But, wouldn’t that get old after awhile? Why would you keep saving the guy?  
  
Also, curious minds needed to know: did Eyepatch leave his mask on when they did it? Rumour says he’s a cutie!  
  
Maybe he took the mask off…because they were in love! Somebody had seen Eyepatch give the Dove a coffee once ( _originally, the story was that the Dove demanded to know what Eyepatch ate, to which he replied with the drink, but who cares!_ ). Somebody else had seen the Dove carrying Eyepatch in his arms ( _when he was bleeding heavily, but who cares!_ ).  
  
Once the rumour mill got-a-grinding, there was no slowing it down.  
  


* * *

Back at Anteiku, Kaneki was waiting tables and trying to ignore Nishiki’s intense stare.  It was getting pretty difficult though, considering that the stare was aimed t his ass and every customer he’d waited on had commented on it. 

  
Finally, he couldn’t tolerate it anymore. The second after he refilled another customer’s cup, he marched over to Nishiki and pulled him into the back room.  
  
“What is your problem????”  
  
He asked, letting go of Nishiki immediately ( _he didn’t have a death wish_ ). Nishiki shrugged and eyed him up from the tip of his toes to the top of his head.  
  
“Just trying to figure out how you got a Dove to bang you.”  
  
NIshiki responded.  
  
And that’s how Kaneki found out about the rumours.

* * *

Amon Koutarou was walking his beat within the 20th ward. Things had been…quiet for him lately. He wasn’t even sure why he was doing a patrol. Ghouls avoided him like the plague now, unless they were trying to pick a fight with Eyepatch.

  
Where was Eyepatch today? How was he doing? Was he alright?  
  
It bothered Amon that the ghoul had been attacked so often lately. Clearly, he could handle it, but it bothered Amon when Eyepatch showed up to a fight in casual clothes ( _with his mask askew, almost like he put it on in a hurry, almost like he might not put it on at all next time_ ). Not because he was worried about him, though. No, Amon hated that the casual clothes meant Eyepatch was stalking him ( _though he never did anything to stop the ghoul from doing so_ ).    
  
Frowning, Amon kicked at some gravel. He was getting kindof bored with this new daily routine. At first, it had been exciting – ghouls would attack, Eyepatch would show up, and a fight would break out on the daily. He hadn’t even SEEN Eyepatch for over a week now…  
  
Not that he missed him. He was just sulking about not getting to ask Eyepatch any questions ( _despite the fact that he hadn’t asked them in the…2 months, probably 2 months, since this started_ ).    
  
As he was lost in thought, a voice came from overhead,  
  
“Oi, you,”  
  
It said ( _a ghoul with a snake mask peering down at him_ ),  
  
“How’d you manage to get into Eyepatch’s pants?”  
  
And that’s how Nishiki broke 4 bones and Amon found out about the rumour.

* * *

“Investigator Amon, how do you keep getting into trouble!?”

Eyepatch demanded to know, pulling Amon by the arm out of the smoking rubble of a broken down lab alongside some of his fellow investigators. His ghoul crew hung around behind him, coughing awkwardly as Eyepatch continued to hold onto Amon.

“It’s like I can’t leave you alone for a single second! No wonder everyone thinks we’re-“

The ghoul cut himself off abruptly, but it was already too late. Akira’s eyes sparkled with interest and Amon felt his face turning red ( _from embarrassment! Not the arm holding_!).

“We’re not dating!”

Amon blurted before covering his mouth in horror at Akira’s slowly widening smirk. The ghoul in the snake mask snickered and Eyepatch released his arm long enough to smack at them.

Eyepatch’s crew left quickly after that, but not before Amon spotted how pink their leader’s ears were against his mask. Also not before Akira called out,

“So, if Investigator Amon wants a date, does it have to be a coffee date?”

And that’s how the CCG found out about the rumours.

**Author's Note:**

> ANONYMOUS:  
> Nishiki then supplements his income by writing the torrid erotic novel, "How to Get a Dove to Bang You: A Ghoul's Story" (under a pseudonym). It's a stunning cross-species success. Nishiki is now rich. Kaneki nearly killed him when Hide held a dramatic reading in Anteiku of "this super interesting book, though you probably think the author's WAY too heavy on the profanity." Takatsuki Sen loves it and considers jumping on the bandwagon. Amon dies when he sees Arima reading it at a meeting.


End file.
